Easteroid!
by Megawacky Max
Summary: It’s Easter season and Zim learns a bit about the Easter Bunny and Easter Eggs. Now, things get a bit dangerous when he decides to give all the hideous and stinking humans a most out-of-this-world Easter treat!


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-o-   
  
Easteroid!   
  
Written by:

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Megawacky Max   
  
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Author's Notes:**   
You maybe _THINK_ I own these characters and/or series? You are then _WAY_ wrong, dude. Just enjoy the fic.   
Also, special thanks to **Eve13**, who is responsible of the corrections in my grammar. Thanks, Evie! ^_^   
**  
-o-   
  
Chapter 1   
The bunnies are coming**   


"Gir, no! Stop! _Augh!_ Gir, Gir, _GIIIIIIR_, stop immediately! _AAHHGIRIORDERYOUTOSTOOOP!!!_", the disguised Irken yelled at his not-so-loyal robot slave. 

Gir had been chasing the bunny-disguised human for about three or so blocks, not stopping at the red lights, incoming trucks, little Beatle cars or even small crowds of scared people. All were forced to crash on either side of the path made by the terrorized runaway human and the chasing green pup. 

Zim, strongly gripping Gir's leash, decided to make his word law. 

"I said _STOP_!", he ordered. 

The little pup just yelled his happiness. "I'm gonna hug the fluffy pink bunny!!" 

"No, Gir! No bunnies! Stop right now!" 

The scared bunny-man kept his fear-fueled feet pointed toward the park, then some alleys and _THEN_... a dead end. He reached the brick wall and turned, back and arms glued to the cold barrier and his popped eyes staring through the smiling open mouth of the bunny head he was currently wearing. In front of him, blocking the only exit, a little green pup had begun his horrible zombie-walking of incoming and impending _DOOM_. 

"No! _NOOO!_ Leave me alone! Nooo!" 

"_I'm gonna huuuuuuuuug yooooooouuuu_...", Gir slowly declared. 

"_Noooooooo!_", the man froze dead. 

Gir leapt at him. The man felt the little weight of the creature. His knees failed him and his trembling back fell to the ground. Gir, on top of the man's pink and fluffy tummy, smiled at him. 

"Hi, bunny!", he cheerfully saluted, then began to swallow the Easter eggs held in the man's basket. 

"Ya had your fun??", the man rose an angry head from the dirty floor of the alley. "Good! Now, leave me alone!" 

The man stood up and swept his disguise free of dust. He stopped to scowl at the owner of such an annoying little brat-dog. 

"_Ahem_...", Zim also stood up, strongly holding the leash. "I want to apologize for the behavior of my _STUPID_," he suddenly yelled at Gir, "little puppy. May this incident be forg-_OW, YIKES!!_" 

Zim had jumped back, rising his arms as a lame attempt of defense. The bunny-man had taken the head of his disguise off. 

"What's with you, kid?", he asked, annoyed. 

"What's with _me_? You have eaten a human!" 

"Whaaat?!" 

"Not that it's a bad thing, actually...", Zim re-thought his position. "Hey, how do you like World Domination and the end of all mankind?" 

"You're crazy, pal! I'm just disguised. I need to earn some extra money for Easter," the man explained. 

"Easter? What is... _Easter_?", Zim wondered. 

"You don't know what Easter is? Wow, what planet did you come from?" 

"_HOW DID YOU KNOW!!_", Zim jumped at him and grabbed the man by the pink collar of the disguise. "_TELL ZIM!!_" 

"Gee, dude. Don't take it personal. It was an expression." 

"I like expressions!", Gir chirped, swallowing yet another Easter egg. 

"I knew that...", Zim climbed down and coughed. "I'm, uh... a foreign -and perfectly normal- worm baby... Yep... that's... eh... pretty much it, yeah..." 

"Oh," the man seemed to understand. "Well, then you better know about Easter. It's a celebration where people gather and exchange Easter eggs, like the ones in the basket. _HEY!!_" 

The man snatched the basket out of Gir's mouth, as well as two remaining Easter eggs. 

"Gee, _THANKS_! Now I'll have problems with the boss, see?", the man grunted. "Now I won't earn my pink bunny-ears!" 

"Yes, yes, that's a pity-_Now keep informing Ziiim_...", he demanded. 

The man raised an eyebrow at him. "Man, you're weird... Anyway, they exchange these chocolate-" 

"_Chocolate!!_", yelled Gir. 

"-Easter eggs, see? The legend says a pink bunny used to hide the eggs so the children would search for them." 

"Did the bunny hid these eggs because they were... _mortal_?", Zim examined one of the eggs. 

"Mortal? Hah, now that's new. No, kid... He just... well... _hid them_." 

"Just because?" 

"Just because." 

"Really?" 

"Yes, really." 

"What a dumb creature!" 

"I kinda think so." 

"So what are these good for, anyway?", he asked, trying to find a fuse on the egg. 

"You eat them. Very tasty, trust me. I once brought a ten-pound chocolate Easter egg to class," the man smiled. "Boy, my schoolmates _LOVED_ me after that! They even elected me Class President!" 

Zim's disguised eyes bugged out. "Just because you brought this thingy to a group of morons?" 

"Yeah!" 

"And they declared you _RULER_ of the class??" 

"Yep." 

"And... what would happen if I bring a giant Easter egg to... let's say... The World? Would they all make me their _SUPREME RULER_?!" 

"Well, that would be it, yeah... Anyway, you won't find such a big egg. Pretty messy. And if you'll excuse me, I have to re-fill the basket. Where... Where is my basket? _Augh!_ Gimme that!" 

The man pulled the basket out of Gir's mouth for the second time. Then he put on the giant bunny-head and walked away. 

"Bye, bunny lord!", Gir smiled. "Bring peace and happiness to the world, ridin' your golden whale!" 

Zim ignored his robot's nonsense. He was thinking deeply. A ten-pound Easter egg had gathered the attention of an entire class filled up with nauseous human larvae... Then... _WHAT_ would he need to lure the entire and absolute World before his Invader feet? 

The answer came along with a soft, cautious chuckle... the former becoming louder and louder until it was a maniacal laugh of doom. 

**-o-o-o-**

Dib was in his room, examining some Top Secret files on his computer. It'd been days since Zim was last seen at Skool. Dib was fearing he was up to something. 

"I _know_ he's up to something," he nodded. "He must be! He is _always_ up to something. I know he is. He... _He_..." 

"Agent Mothman, who are you talking to?", a voice came from the computer speakers. 

Dib stared at the screen an noticed the link with the Swollen Eyeballs has been activated. 

"Uh... To myself?", he smiled. 

"Stop that... _please_," the image on screen hissed. "We have been analyzing the house you mentioned with our super scanners." 

"Results?" 

"None." 

"None?" 

"Yes, none. No life forms were in the house." 

"Thanks for the favor, Agent Darkbootie," sighed Dib. 

"We'll be in touch," said the Agent. The link was broken. 

Dib turned in his chair. His mind was sunk in a lake of doubts... although, as his classmates had often said, considering Dib's king-sized head, it wasn't a lake but an _Ocean_. 

"_My head is not big!_" Dib repeated his protest unconsciously as he thought. 

Dib decided to go downstairs. _Mysterious Mysteries_ was about to start and he wanted to watch it. He sat on the big sofa and turned on the TV. Curiously, the only thing on TV was snow. 

"What the...? Hey, Dad! What's with the TV?" 

"What's with those aliens, ghosts and other unreal phenomena of yours, son?", Professor Membrane yelled from his location in the kitchen. 

"You didn't _need_ the sarcasm!", Dib yelled back, annoyed. "And I meant, what's with the TV that doesn't work!" 

"Ah, nothing like easy work for a change," Membrane said, returning from the kitchen with a sandwich. 

He left the food on the table and stared at the TV. 

"This will be easy, son." He extended his right arm at Dib. "Bring to me my Radioactive Protective Suit! _Go!_" 

Dib doubted... then wondered: "Couldn't you try to fix the TV in the traditional way, instead?" 

"Oh, well...", Membrane shrugged, then heavily pounded the TV. 

Nothing happened. 

"Sorry, son... Science has done his best." 

Before Dib could express his sarcasm, the TV began to flicker. Membrane sent his two mighty fists (protected by rubber gloves) to the air. 

"_EUREKA!!_ Science has succeeded yet again!!", he yelled. 

"Yay, Dad..." Dib rolled his eyes. Then focused both on the screen. "Hey... What is _that_?" 

The image showed the silhouette of what seemed to be... a bunny, hidden within the shadows. 

"Attention, humans!", said the bunny. "Easter is coming, and so will I! It is me, the one and only, pink and fluffy-" 

"And with long, cozy ears!", yelped a pitching voice. 

"-_Easter Bunny_!!" 

The lights turned on to illuminate Zim, wearing a most comical pink and fluffy bunny outfit. Gir was at his side, wearing the traditional green puppy suit, but modified with pink fluffy ears and a pink fluffy tail. 

"_Zim!!_", Dib's index finger catapulted to the screen. 

"That's not your foreign friend, Dib. It's the Easter Bunny!", said Membrane. 

"This year," resumed Bunny-Zim, "there won't be Easter-Egg-Hiding! This year, my fellow and horrible children, this year I am telling you, this year you will be pleased and treated by _ME_, the Easter Bunny!!" 

"Yay!!", yelped Gir, tossing little Easter Eggs at his disguised master. 

"_Ouch, ouch!_ Stop it!", he pushed the robot away. "Anyway, I-...", he was interrupted by more flying little Easter Eggs, coming from off screen. "_GIR, QUIT IT!!_" He turned to the camera. "This year, children and adults from all this stinking and _HORRIBLE_ rock you dare call _'A Planet'... THIS YEAR_, you will be pleased to name me _RULER_ of the World after you receive my most glorious threat... _BEHOLD!!_" 

The camera has interference, then a general shot of the outer space. 

"This what you see," Zim's voice was heard off screen, "is the Space as you know it. That is my ship, the _Bunnytron_!" 

A giant and pink bunny-shaped spaceship appeared from the bottom of the screen, then approached until coming into full view. 

"And that behind, being carried by the Bunnytron Ray, is my treat!" 

Following behind the Bunnytron, surrounded by an eerie blue ray, there was a massive and menacing oval asteroid, only it was painted like... 

"... A giant Easter Egg! Or, as I call it... _THE EASTEROID_!!" 

"I'm gonna eat it!!", Gir yelled off screen. 

"Easteroid?!", Dib jumped on the back of the sofa. "That's no Easteroid! That's an _ASTEROID_! Zim is bringing a disguised asteroid to Earth! Dad, we gotta do something! ... ... ... _Dad?!_" 

Dib realized Membrane was holding a sign reading _'Easteroid Rocks!'_. 

The TV showed Zim again. 

"Be patient, my future slaves! The trip is long, but I shall arrive by tomorrow. Soon, the Earth will taste the power of... _THE EASTEROID_!" Zim murmured to himself, not noticing the camera was still rolling, "Heh. Easteoid. I like how it sounds... _'Easteroid!!'_, heh, heh..." 

The TV returned to the snow, then to the regular transmission. Dib jumped off the couch and exclaimed: 

"Dad, that's not the Easter bunny! That's a disguised alien carrying a huge boulder to... to... to _boulder_ the Earth!" 

"Son, son, you are just paranoid," Membrane patted his son's _*huge*_ head. "Relax and enjoy the wait. Oh, by the way, this is for you. Happy Easter!" 

Membrane handed Dib a little Easter egg with a tiny button on top. Dib pushed the button and the egg opened. A little Membrane puppet (complete with fluffy pink bunny ears!) sprang out. 

"_Happy Easter!!_", it chirped in a most squeaking voice. Then the egg just closed shut. 

Dib stared at the treat in astonishment, then scowled at it. 

**-o-o-o-**

"Agent Darkbootie! Agent Darkbootie!!", yelled Dib at the computer monitor. The shape of the person he looked for was shown on screen. 

"What is it, Agent Mothman?" 

"Did you happen to watch TV, lately?" 

"Not really. What happened?" 

"_Zim!!_ The alien I've been telling you about!! He's bringing a giant asteroid to Earth, disguised as the ultimate Easter treat!!" 

There was a long pause. 

"_Really?_", Darkbootie asked. 

"Of course it is! I need assistance! I need help! I-...!" 

"I'm afraid you are alone." 

"What?!", Dib gasped. 

"Most of our Agents are preparing for Easter themselves. Too few crew around." 

"Are you telling me you won't help me?!" 

"So far as I know, you already have better help at your side." 

"How's that?" 

"You've told us of certain captured ship..." 

Dib's mind began to work. "Yes, Tak's ship, but... _Hey_... That's it! I can use it to intercept Zim and his Bunnytron spaceship and stop him from ever delivering the Easteroid!! I'll do it, Agent Mothman! Wish me luck!" 

"Did you say _'Bunnytron spaceship'_, per cha-..." the communication link was closed by Dib. 

The boy quickly opened other folders in his PC system. He found the remote access to his captured ship. 

"Wake up, my little helper...", he whispered, "... It's time for us to save Earth, again." 

Inside the garage of the house, stored under a blanket, the lights in the cockpit of the ship were suddenly on. 

It was time for Dib to act in Zim's play. 

**-o-**


End file.
